How to Create a Friendship in 60 Seconds
Creating a Friendship
Remember that for better or worse, people tend to judge others based on first impressions.This is just a fact of life.
- Pay attention to your personal hygiene (shower, brush your teeth, check your breath) and dress attractively.
- You don't have to be fancy or overdressed; just avoid looking too sloppy or unwashed.
Smile and project a positive attitude.
- A smile is kind of a universal sign that you're friendly and your intentions are good. It also suggests that you have a positive personality, which is appealing to most people.
- If you have trouble smiling naturally, try thinking of something that makes you happy.
Quickly choose someone to approach and talk to.Be sure not to choose some random stranger, just make sure that you known them the least bit and at least know their name.
- Don't agonize over this – the point is to talk to as many people as possible in a social setting to increase your chances of making a new friend.
- Don't choose people based on their "attractiveness," or on how "confident" they appear. Your new best friend may not fit either of those descriptions, but may still be a fantastic person. So just approach anyone who looks available for a conversation. If the conversation doesn't pan out, you can always move on with no guilt (see below).
- Put yourself at ease by remembering that the people around you are probably as interested in making new friends as you are.
Start the conversation.Look, you approached this person, so logically it's up to you to start the ball rolling. Almost any opening remark can start a productive conversation.
- If the two of you happen to have anything in common, start with that. For example, "Hey, I think I've seen you in my biology class – how do you like that teacher?" Or, "Do you work at Starbucks? I think I've seen you there."
- Give the person a compliment that leads to a question: "Wow, that's a really nice bracelet – where did you get it?" Or maybe, "Your hair looks amazing – how do you get it to do that?"
- Go with the age-old standby – the weather. If it's hot, say you're burning up and you need to sit down for a minute. If it's raining, say you'd been planning to go shopping (or biking, or sightseeing, or something else interesting), but now you might be changing your plans.
Keep the conversation going.Unless the person is disastrously insecure or just not in the mood to talk (it happens), your opening line will get some kind of response. Be prepared to follow up with additional remarks.
Be a good listener.This is one of the main things that people respond to when meeting someone new – when you give someone your attention, you make that person feel important and worthwhile.
- Make eye contact – the best way to show that you're tuned in. Don't stare into space or look at other people, anddefinitelydon't look at your phone!
- When the person makes a statement or relates a story, give a response that expands on the topic or otherwise shows that you understand.
Okay, it's been 60 seconds.Did you make a connection?
- If no, that's okay. You won't strike gold every time, and people aren't always in the mood to be social, so you shouldn't feel discouraged. All you have to do is politely disengage yourself ("Hey, thanks for chatting. I should get going – talk to you later!") and then find a new person to approach.
- If yes,great!Keep talking for as long as it's comfortable, and then when it's time to go, be sure to exchange phone numbers and/or email addresses so you can stay in touch. Then be sure to follow up. This may not turn into the friendship of a lifetime, but you'll only find out by taking the initiative and contacting the person to talk or hang out again.
QuestionShould I do if the person is rude?wikiHow ContributorCommunity AnswerIf the person your trying to connect with is rude, then don't waste your time. There are plenty of other people to befriend in the world.Thanks!
QuestionHow do I make new friends after I've abandoned my old friends?wikiHow ContributorCommunity AnswerBe nice and polite. Help them whenever you can. Find things you can talk about together that are interesting to the other person.Thanks!
QuestionWhat if you're just bad at having a conversation? I sat with a person in my class and nothing was said.wikiHow ContributorCommunity AnswerYou have to be confident about making the conversation before going in. Sometimes you're just sick and tired of the class, so you can't think of anything to say. Just express your feeling at that moment! Say "Man, this class was tiring", or anything that the other person will 100% agree with. Then, if he/she responded, and seemed interested, ask him/her for their name, and talk about how their day was going, or what courses they take. Make sure the conversation never stops, unless the person didn't show any interest and left you asking all the questions, as if it were an interrogation.Thanks!
QuestionWhat should I do if my friend does not want me to make friends, and only hang out with her?wikiHow ContributorCommunity AnswerIt's okay for your friend to be a little protective, but not allowing you to branch out is just clingy. They should want you to make new friends, as long as you let them do the same. Try to talk to them about it and make sure they understand that even if you make new friends they'll never be replaced. If they don't understand or get angry, then maybe it is better to make new friends because this person clearly is not being a very good friend.Thanks!
QuestionWhat if my BFF doesn't want me to make new friend?wikiHow ContributorCommunity AnswerYou and your best friend are allowed to have as many friends as you like. Assure them that they're still your best friend and your top priority.Thanks!
QuestionHow can I make friends in middle school?wikiHow ContributorCommunity AnswerThanks!
QuestionDo I have to be friends with my classmates?wikiHow ContributorCommunity AnswerNo, you don't have to be friends, but it's a good idea to try and be friendly with everyone at least. You definitely don't want to make any enemies either.Thanks!
QuestionHow do I become friends with a popular person?wikiHow ContributorCommunity AnswerThem being popular doesn't change whether or not they're good or bad people. If you think that this is someone you genuinely want to get to know (not just for popularity), then go and talk to them! Try hanging out in groups first, make some mutual friends, and just ask them if they ever want to hang out during lunch or something. It seems nerve-wracking at first, but you need to remember that they are just like everybody else and you shouldn't be worried. Just do what you always do when you try to make new friends.Thanks!
QuestionHow do I become friends with a girl I like in high school?wikiHow ContributorCommunity AnswerThanks!
QuestionWhat if the person you're talking to isn't interested in you?wikiHow ContributorCommunity AnswerMost situations are dependent on a fact. Were you somehow too imposing? Perhaps the way you acted came across as too timid, strong, impulsive or giggly? People have preferences for communication styles that can influence their interest in you. Let's say A abhors a timid B and prefers impulsive C. Though in most cases, people choose from appearance. However, appearance is not a criteria for friendship. Your main focus point is finding a friendship that lasts.Thanks!
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- No matter how good a listener you are, don't let that person do the all the talking. It is very boring.
- Be yourself. There's no point in creating a friendship based on a personality that isn't truly your own.
- With most people you won't be instant-besties, but don't worry; good friendship takes time to develop.
- If you feel shy to talk in a direct way, then talk with that particular person on Facebook or other social networking sites, but after one conversation, talk with them directly, make eye contact.
- If you want to make friends you could even post a "Wanted: Friends" poster on the bulletin board at your school, church, etc. and provide a few details. It's likely to strike people as whimsical and endearing, if a bit desperate.
- Don't wait for opportunities to make friends– they may never come on their own. Instead, work hard to create opportunities for initiating contact. For example, if someone needs a ride to the store to do some shopping and you need to go shopping too, offer the person a ride. That's a great opportunity to have a conversation and get to know the person.
- If it does not work in 60 seconds, don't feel desperate. Keep chatting, but be careful not to annoy him/her; this is still the first time you're chatting with the person.
- A great time to make friends is when you might be going to a soccer clinic or maybe at the start of your university career. These are great times to make friends because all the people around you will be in the same boat as you.
- Compliments can be a great icebreaker, but be careful of sounding insincere or phony. Never manufacture a compliment that you don't actually mean, because people can often tell when this is the case and your conversation may not go well.
- When you make that first contact with your potential new friend and it's going well, be careful not to go overboard in case you seem too "clingy." After you've talked successfully for 5 or 10 minutes, that may be the right time to exchange contact info and agree to talk or meet again soon.
- Humor can be an effective icebreaker too, but it can also backfire. You may think you're making an innocent joke, but it may inadvertently offend the person you're talking to. People can surprise you with what they do and don't consider funny – so it's best to use humor carefully and sparingly until you know the person a little better.
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Date: 13.12.2018, 16:57 / Views: 44235